19 August 2001, 12:07 GMT

"Extreme Perl is much more extreme than plain boring old XP," XPerl founder Mary Squalor explains.

"Us Perl users stand by our convictions that Perl is still very much the ultimate programming language, and its followers shall one day inherit the Earth. That is why we truly deserve the XP moniker."

Extreme Neo-XP fanatic Nathan 'Dwayne' Nockson disagrees: "This is much less to do with language comparisons than it is to do with recognition and acceptance of what XP is really all about," he explains.

"In fact, XP does not preclude the use of any programming language. We welcome all devotees into our fold, regardless of race, creed or religion. Or programming language. Everyone that is prepared to adapt to our special ways, is welcome into our methodology cult."

Nevertheless, the surprise lawsuit is proceeding. Mary Squalor explains: "Extreme Perl goes much, much further than XP. Dwayne is right, it's not about the language. Perl is simply the medium with which we express ourselves. It happens to be exactly right for our needs, as it is so pure and simple, and yet so cryptic and impossible to decipher. For us it is the perfect paradox - it sort of cleanses our spirits and our minds, and encourages the more 'extreme' aspects of our methodology - the peer reviews, the hall of shame and of course the beatings - to manifest themselves."

The suit will be heard in the Central Missouri Small Claims Court next Thursday.

Elsewhere - Related Stories and Sites:

NY Times: Extreme Pogo-Stick Club Suing For Use of XP Acronym

Boston Herald: Extreme Puppy-kicking Society Want XP Acronym For Themselves

Boston Herald: Extreme Eggs-Peeing Club Want - oh never mind...